Our First Sonogram

For all you first time daddys out there, a sonogram is a computerized picture of an internal organ. They actually use sound waves to create the image and not X-rays. Which is considered to be extremely safe for a baby. It's a pretty neat deal actually. The technition squirts a little gel on mommys tummy and then uses a transducer wand to emit the sound waves, thus creating a picture. The only inconvience in our experience was that my wife had to drink like 60 ounces of water before the appointment (to inflate her stomach) then let half of it out in the bathroom right before the test. Other than that it was very easy and smooth. It was wonderful seeing our baby boy up on the screen.

As soon as the tech put the wand to her stomach, Ryker made his gender well known (as you can probably see in the picture.) Luckily we wanted to know the gender or else he would have ruined the surprise for us in the first 5 minutes. "He's a very proud young man." The tech told us. I will just leave you with this... I wonder where he gets that from :).

So Do You Wan't a Boy or Girl?

So do you want to have a boy or a girl? This is probably the #1 question I was asked leading up to our first ultra sound. My answer... I would love to have a boy someday but as long as he/she is healthy then that is all I can ask for. Can you blame a man for wanting a boy? No way! It is in our DNA to not only reproduce but to have our name survive, to live on and ultimatly conquer... Okay maybe not that far. I think you get the idea.

Not to say that I was not super excited when I saw the "it's a boy" picture on the TV screen. The key to answering this question is to tread very lightly. It depends on the person asking the question. Are they your in-laws? Your friends? If it is your in-laws then you have some upstream navigating to do. Make sure they know you will be pleased with either outcome but it is okay to have a preference. This news will undoubtedly reach your wife/girlfriend. So don't dig a grave you arn't willing to lay in.

In the end it's all about having a boy healthy baby is it not? If you are truely disapointed in the outcome then shame on you! It is a blessing either way, unless you happen to live in China then you only get one shot. That is a different story.

Either sex has it's pros and cons. Both can be taught to play sports, play pranks on mom, and someday drink beer. Depending on your geographical location the latter would not be considered very "lady like." My end point is this, be happy either way. This is not like Walmart where you can make exchanges. If you are having a different gender then what you expected then find something you can have in common, whether it is fishing, cooking, sports, school, dolls, sewing you name it. But then again maybe you are a dad that really want's to have a girl, that is awesome and more power to you! I know that if we are so blessed as to have another child I would love to have a girl. I really dont think that it is a big deal either way for you to have your preferences, just do it tactfully.

Learn to be a crafty dad if you have too!

I will post our 1st ultrasound pictures later this week, so stay tuned!

Necessity is the Mother of Invention

I feel compelled to tell about this clever Mcgyver-ish take on maternity jeans. I have yet to ask where she got this idea from or if she is just that good. My wife ordered some maternity jeans of the internet and could not wait for them to get here. She took a simple elastic hair tie ( the circle ones) pinched one end, fed it through the button hole on her jeans, then wrapped it around the button. Ta da! easy maternity jeans. Just make sure your shirt covers the unzipped zipper :).

The Infamous Leash Backpack

This is my controversial post for the week. I have seen countless parents at stores that have their children on a leash. There are many ways to approach this situation. Maybe the child is hard to control, tough to keep track of, your afraid of he/she being kidnapped etc... I would love to approach this with a pair of scissors, setting this poor child free from the monkey backpack leash that constrains them. Children need to be allowed to walk the stores knowing they need to stay close to mommy and daddy. Heck if they do get lost in Target they should have been taught to find an authority figure (employee) and have you paged (personal story there). This will not only teach them how to think for themselves also it will give them experience with emergency situations. If they are old enough to walk on their own in a store, then they're old enough to be shown what to do if they get seperated from mom or dad. It may just be a coincidence that a lot of these "bound children" that are being walked like a dog are being walked by an overweight parent. This is not to offend, merely an observation that leads me to think that in those situations they are just plain lazy.

The leash is a great invention. It allows us to keep control, keep close, and maintain dominence... With our pets, not our children. Kids these days are so protected that when they get that little taste of freedom they take it to the extreme. Spend the time to teach your kid to stay close, and not wonder, keep an eye on them, and if they happen to get lost hiding in the clothes rack then it will be a lesson well learned when they have to embarrass mommy on the page system in the store.

The First Gyno Appointment

Gynecologist... Get used to saying it fellas. You will be making monthly trips to this lovely doc for the first few months then bi-monthly trips, then weekly trips (depeneding on your situtation and the doctors prefrences of course). You need to learn to be comfortable not having any of the attention. This is all about your lovely mommy to be. She is the one that is pregnant, not you. Repeat this like a mantra in your head. It is easy to want to pipe up and give your 2 cents but please refrain. Use this time to soak everything in and learn as much as you can about what mommy has to look forward too. This way you can be ahead of the game when any situation arises. Usually they will weigh her, make her pee in a cup, and possibly take blood samples. (remember, this is from my experience. Every doctor can/probably will be different. This first appointment is usually too early to hear any heart beat of the babies. Don't worry if the doctor tries and is unsuccessful. Right now your baby is extremely tiny.

It is important to try and be at this appointment, the gyno will need important family health history and it's good to know yours and your wifes blood types. Off the top of my head I believe that if both parents are O- then there is a special shot mommy needs around 28 weeks to prevent any incapatability issues with the baby. Again, I am no doctor. Other than that these appointments don't take long and are really just to monitor mommy as the process evolves. It is important that you are there for her at this time, it will show that you are wanting to learn and be involved. So take a break from Call of Duty and get your butt to the Gynecologist. Maybe mommy will take you out for ice cream after!

Tip of the day: Be there for your wife/girlfriend/partner/whatever title fits. YOU'RE A TEAM!

How do I tell my family she's pregnant?

This is a really sensitive area. personally I wanted to call my parents up that day, but that is just the relationship I have with them. I forgot to mention that I now live about 1700 miles away from my hometown. I joined the Air Force in fall of 2010 and got stationed in the midwest. The reason why we kept it our own little secret is because the first couple of weeks are very crucial. A lot of complications can arrise in the first trimester. Pregnancy is broken into 3 trimesters and each trimester is roughly 3 months long. 3x3=9 months. My wife and I didn't want to have to tell everyone if something went wrong. It is pretty traumatic to have a miscarriage and it would have been too hard to explain it to all of our friends and family. I know that we still arn't out of the woods but you have to tell them sometime. A misscarriage can happen at any stage but less likely in the later weeks. So we kept it on the downlow for almost a month. After her first doctors appointment we felt comfortable letting the cat out of the bag. I also feel it is important to get your feelings straight before you start getting input from every direction possible.

My parents happened to be visiting for Thanksgiving so we sat my parents down on the couch and gave my mom a gift bag. Inside my wife had wrapped a cute frame that had a not in it that said something like "this frame will be filled july 2012." It also had a picture of the pregnancy test (positive). My parents reaction was wonderful. They were both very happy to hear the news. My mom had a little moment of shock afterwards but everyone handles important news differently. After informing my parents we called Kayla's family and told them over the phone. Which was not the best way to do it but it's not like we could just fly home that day. Everyone was overjoyed to hear that we would be adding another person to the family.

One large piece of advice is to not be nervous about their reaction. Even if you don't happen to be married yet. Parents would much rather hear about it from you then after you try to hide it from them. The majority of the time your parents situation was far worse then your own. In the end they are your parents and will have unconditional love for you nomatter what. It is human nature. Also, don;t get upset if they don't react the way you hoped right away. Emotions cause people to do and say crazy things in stressful situtations. Understand that they may just need some time to deal with it in their own way.

Next: The wonderful changes she's going through