I have to buy what?

When you find out that your going to be a dad a lot of things start going on. You have all these thoughts rushing around your brain about providing, expenses, security, etc... This is perfectly normal. I happen to have the answer to all of these problems.

1. Providing: As long as you understand that it is your sole duty to provide for your family then you will be just fine. Money will always come and go. It's what you do with it when it comes that makes the difference. Prior to baby being born you should be saving like a mad man. Save wherever possible. Put money in savings, save a coin jar, collect all those beer cans and recycle. It will add up and give you a little cushion.

2. Expenses: Cribs, diapers, clothes, and strollers are no doubt expensive. So shop around for a crib. Look on Craigslist, check the newspaper, ask around. We got an awesome crib w/ baby changeing station from a friend for $100. Start buying diapers once a week. This will slowly build you an "armageddon supply." (the picture on the right knows whats up!) This will keep the cost from being so staggering all at once. Build up to this over the course of the last couple months.

  Try to find a friend who just had a baby of the same gender to get baby clothes. They will grow out of those newborns in the first 3 weeks (roughly). Don't spend all of your money on a bunch of nike/under armor outfits unless there on sale. You are not expected to up front all of this money to buy these things. Have a friend or mom throw your wife a baby shower. throw yourself your own manly baby shower with plenty of pizza, beer and Sportscenter.

3. Security: This is a big one. You wan't to know that your wife and baby are safe. Especially when your not home. I am in a career field that is constantly on the road or deploying. For this reason my wife and I are moving on base in April. That way I am sure that they will be safe and have help nearby if needed. Whatever it takes for your family to be safe whether you are present or not is what you need to do.

Hope these 3 quick tips are helpful. This was pretty much my first major worries that bothered me from day 1. I am happy to say that they bother me no more.

Our First Sonogram

For all you first time daddys out there, a sonogram is a computerized picture of an internal organ. They actually use sound waves to create the image and not X-rays. Which is considered to be extremely safe for a baby. It's a pretty neat deal actually. The technition squirts a little gel on mommys tummy and then uses a transducer wand to emit the sound waves, thus creating a picture. The only inconvience in our experience was that my wife had to drink like 60 ounces of water before the appointment (to inflate her stomach) then let half of it out in the bathroom right before the test. Other than that it was very easy and smooth. It was wonderful seeing our baby boy up on the screen.

As soon as the tech put the wand to her stomach, Ryker made his gender well known (as you can probably see in the picture.) Luckily we wanted to know the gender or else he would have ruined the surprise for us in the first 5 minutes. "He's a very proud young man." The tech told us. I will just leave you with this... I wonder where he gets that from :).

Crafty Way to Announce Babies Gender

There are many ways to tell friends about the gender of the baby. In this day and age why not use the tools given to us? At first I was not sure if I was comfortable using facebook to mass inform my friends. I dont know, I felt it to be a little immature but after thinking about that many phone calls... Needless to say cooler heads prevailed. Kayla is a Pinterest addict, and found some awesome ways to display our new baby.

SPOILER ALERT! I havn't stated the gender of our baby yet but, this picture will give it away :)

This is how we decided to inform our friends about the good news. Be crafty! It's Fun!

How do I tell my family she's pregnant?

This is a really sensitive area. personally I wanted to call my parents up that day, but that is just the relationship I have with them. I forgot to mention that I now live about 1700 miles away from my hometown. I joined the Air Force in fall of 2010 and got stationed in the midwest. The reason why we kept it our own little secret is because the first couple of weeks are very crucial. A lot of complications can arrise in the first trimester. Pregnancy is broken into 3 trimesters and each trimester is roughly 3 months long. 3x3=9 months. My wife and I didn't want to have to tell everyone if something went wrong. It is pretty traumatic to have a miscarriage and it would have been too hard to explain it to all of our friends and family. I know that we still arn't out of the woods but you have to tell them sometime. A misscarriage can happen at any stage but less likely in the later weeks. So we kept it on the downlow for almost a month. After her first doctors appointment we felt comfortable letting the cat out of the bag. I also feel it is important to get your feelings straight before you start getting input from every direction possible.

My parents happened to be visiting for Thanksgiving so we sat my parents down on the couch and gave my mom a gift bag. Inside my wife had wrapped a cute frame that had a not in it that said something like "this frame will be filled july 2012." It also had a picture of the pregnancy test (positive). My parents reaction was wonderful. They were both very happy to hear the news. My mom had a little moment of shock afterwards but everyone handles important news differently. After informing my parents we called Kayla's family and told them over the phone. Which was not the best way to do it but it's not like we could just fly home that day. Everyone was overjoyed to hear that we would be adding another person to the family.

One large piece of advice is to not be nervous about their reaction. Even if you don't happen to be married yet. Parents would much rather hear about it from you then after you try to hide it from them. The majority of the time your parents situation was far worse then your own. In the end they are your parents and will have unconditional love for you nomatter what. It is human nature. Also, don;t get upset if they don't react the way you hoped right away. Emotions cause people to do and say crazy things in stressful situtations. Understand that they may just need some time to deal with it in their own way.

Next: The wonderful changes she's going through

I'm Going To Be a Dad

This is an interesting time in the pregnancy spectrum. I believe this would be different for everyone, I entered this phase about 2 weeks after I found out. I remember going to work and just feeling like I was in a different dimension. My mind was everywhere and nowhere at the same time. After work I sat in my truck and really didn't know what I was going through at the moment. All I could think about is how could I provide for another person. Another mouth to feed, more clothes to buy, how will I afford it's college (at this point it is an it because up until a month ago we didn't know the gender). Multiply these thoughts by 50 and that is similar to what I was going through. It is important to note that this is too early to bring these thoughts up to your mommy to be. This is because all it brings about is fear, uncertainty, and doubt that you are wanting to go through with it. I am not going to get into the argument against/for abortion because this is not a blog about that. My views are my views alone. Your mommy to be wants to know that if she is willing to do this, that her man will be leading the way. Another month or so down the road would be more appropriate for bringing these feelings forward. At this time they will be more organized, the "heat of the moment" will have worn off and you will better understand your own feelings. After sitting in my truck collecting my thoughts I drove to the Babies R' Us and walked in. I didn't plan on buying anything frankly becuase I don't know anything about babies. I don't know what they eat, how they sleep, what they like or even what they do. I have no prior experience in this field. You could say I was totally lost. I really just walked around. Reading signs, looking at prices, looking at diapers, and about fell over when I saw how much those darn things cost. This has been the biggest hurdle for me to get over. The cost. But once you get over it your life is instantly better. It is good practice to check prices, and to cut corners in certain areas but when it boils down to it, you will never be financially stable enough to afford a baby. Let me put that in lamence terms. You Will Never Feel Financially Ready To Have A Baby.

After I left the store I felt at piece with the idea, and even fairly excited for the future. It was definantly a good moment for me. I got some time to get myself collected, and ready for everything mother nature would throw my way.

Next up: Telling the famly.